Teacup Birdfeeders For Stuck-up Birds

Birds are classy. They deserve to be treated like royalty as they run a muck in our neighborhoods, waking us up with annoying chirps and shitting all over our cars immediately after they’ve been washed.

Etsy seller Ohthepollybilities makes these quaint teacup bird-feeders with an ordinary China teacup and some well-placed chain links. The seller describes its possibilities as “endless” but I see little productivity in this teacup for anything other than a bird feeder. It could be hung by a sink to hold sponges, or hung in your bathroom to hold your assortment of toiletry, but who the fuck are you, Martha Stewart? They’re are available for $20, a small price to pay for birds in your yard, chirping your name in the morning.